If I'm To Be Gone

I was wondering if 1 day I'm gone to a far away land not living on Earth anymore, will you people cry for me? Regret your life for not saying the thing or an answer I'm waiting for?? If I were you people I'lll cry for you all but I'll will not leave my life with regrets. I've say what I wanna say do what I wanna do.

Nowadays keep thinking about death and nothing good or pleasant, don't ask me why cause I also don't know. Just afraid that there is this one day I may leave you people and never see you all again. Hope he won't live his life with regret for not saying what I'm kind of waiting for. Because I won't leave with regret as I've already state my stand not being a despo but I don't want to leave the world with anything undone.

Wrong Move

Fred say that I say the wrong thing. As I'm now waiting for him to ask me the question he asked on 15October again. I didn't give him an answer up till now but I've been beating around the bush about it. He knew it and he play along, and I hate playing guessing game with him cause he always know what's in my mind when I don't even have a clue about what he's thinking.

Yi Zhen say I wasted a good chance. I didn't agree with it, after a few thought I agree with her. I don't want history to repeat itself again when I finally manage to forget about my old past which bring me so much pain. I felt relieve to be able to forget him and wasn't with him. Cause he is kind of a violence person, he threw a dustbin to his dad for no reason.

Hinted him again last night, told him my christmas wish for this year. He asked me what present I want but I told him I want someone to take care of me and good results. He didn't say anything then...just say that I'm hinting him. What can I say???I really don't want history to repeat itself again.

Let it go(Kimberly Kirberger)

Throughout your life you will be faced with the challenge of letting go. You may have to let go of a pet that has to be put to sleep, a friend who has moved to another state, or even your favorite shirt that’s been shrunk in the dryer. No matter how big or small your loss might be, letting it go is never easy. Your ability to let go is like a muscle you must develop. The more you practice, the stronger is gets.

It’s important to understand exactly what it means to let go. If your best friend moves far away, you must let go of your attachment to living close to her. You have to learn to be okay with the fact that you won’t be going to the mall together every weekend, walking to school side by side, or sitting together at lunch. However, you don’t have to let go of your friendship, you only have to accept that the things you do together as friends are going to be different now. Letting go is the willingness to accept change and loss.

Understanding the difference between love and attachment is very helpful when a romantic relationship ends. At first everything that reminds you of him-the song you danced to at the prom, the food you used to eat together, the places you used to go. You feel like crying whenever you think of him. The only explanation you can think of for how strongly you feel is that maybe you’re still in love with him.

What’s more likely is that you are feeling the effects of severing an attachment. When you let someone into your life romantically, it’s like theh two of you weave a blanket around yourselves. Each thread that pulls apart can feel painful, even excruciating. But the thing you want to remember is this: Although you are miserable now, you will feel better soon. This is a guarantee. You will not feel this sad forever. Just as it took time to develop an attachment to your boyfriend, it will take time to let it go.

It is also important to be able to let go of your stress. When you catch yourself worrying or obsessing over something you really can’t do anything about, gently remind yourself: This is out of my control. I am going to let it go. This is different from ignoring tour problems. You are simply letting go of the anxiety they create. A sense of peacefulness will come over you when you stop trying to control things and surrender to what is.

Letting go of a serious problem like an eating disorder or drug addiction is extremely challenging. It can take a long time before you realize you even have a problem. It can take even longer before you realize you are ready to get over it. You may have developed the eating disorder or drug addiction as a way to cope with other painful issues in your life. It is often necessary to turn to others-people already in your life and professionals like therapists and doctors-for objective feedback and support.

Whether you are letting go of a relationship that is no longer healthy or the pain you carry due to personal problems you’ve endured, remind yourself that you are freeing up space in your life for new, positive experiences, people, and emotions.

Every bit of memory of BH is just kind of a memory to me now. And he is just a passer-by in my life. It's not easy to forget him but I have manage to do it...Because I've found someone more important than him.

Life Experience

Had a 3hours talk with him last night. I think I really had a heart to heart talk with him for a while. What he say really make sense and it really make me think that life isn't as bad as I think it is.

There is no such things as friends forever. Friends are just parts and parcels in our life. We may be very good friends now but who know what will it be like in the next minute.

Sometimes we should just forget about things and not rememeber it as it brings pain to our life. Rememebr only the happy stuff is what I've learn from him. Now thinking about what I had done in the past is a little foolish yet childish but that is me. And he is just a passer-by in my life who bring a big impact.

A baby was given birth but it's life was taken away. But after given an emergency treatment, it's heart beat started again and now it's alive living strong and health. It's kind of a second life give to the baby. The person treasure it's life and it makes me realiase that life is so fragile as it can be taken away any time at any moment.

I would admit that I'm a person who have got not enough life experience, so what's the big deal everyone will learn from their mistakes, past and others. Thus, it make me really want to treasure the person who told me this stuff even more. Simiply because I really want to learn more from him.

The Missing Part Of Me

Someone keep on asking me about who is the "SPECIAL" someone in my heart. I not going to say who is he. I'm not prepared to deal with what is going to happen after the answer is being say. But I hope if there is any answer, the person can sing a song by Stevie Wonder- I Just Called To Say I Love You. Did I say out who the "SPECIAL" someone is??? Hope I didn't say out who he is or hinted anyone who he is, even if you know also shh...I don't want people to come asking me who is he???

I loved this song very much since I first heard it at Suntec last friday. Just find that the lyrics make a lot of meaning.

Somebody told me he not ready for relationship and say he is useless. Why tell me that?? If you think you are useless then you should do something and prove to yourself that you are not useless. Because no one can help you if you think you yourself is useless. Don't keep on asking who is the person in my heart...I won't say till the day I think it should be say. IF you want to make wild guesses go ahead beacuse I won't say.